Because writing a blog is too mainstream now, I’ve decided to go back into pen and paper. More traditional. More heartfelt. It feels so different to write on paper…again. I’ve been a really avid writer for so many years until I stopped because of a reason God only knows, which I’ll let you know later. But first, let me take a selfie. (done =) )
DIARY. Yeah. I used to write down every single thing happening to me on every single day on my diary. All my secrets. All the crap I made. All the good times I’ve had. All the random thoughts I thought of. From my general daily agenda down to the little things I do. From the color of the sky down to the color of my undies. From my monthly allowance down to every single cent I spent. Literally everything. I can’t describe well enough how detailed I was in writing, but yes, I really was. Just try to imagine a painter who makes sure that each and every angle of his subject is well-painted. That’s how I was so into writing. But just like a Koko Krunch, after one major “poof”, I had a major change, a major turn around. A total 180 degrees turn against writing.
I can still remember that night when I help my diary on top of my lap while riding a bus going to a friend’s place. The notebook was literally trembling right there, no exaggeration. In my friend’s house, I tore every single page, read it, cried over it, then finally thew every precious paper on fire. It was the corniest melodrama of the year but trust me, I only go melodramatic once in a blue moon. Yes, I burned everything, hoping that doing so would erase the stabbing feeling in my heart because of what that diary has cost me. That night, I swore to every single moth dancing near the flames that I will never write again, like ever.
I never knew that words were edible, because right now, I am obviously eating my own words. After almost two years of never laying an eye on my pen and paper, here I am, back to my good ol’ habit but writing as a brand new me. Maybe they were right about old habits never dying. So… it’s official. I’m writing. I’m back.
This time though, I’ll write differently. I won’t write about me, myself and I. These would be more like reflections. Probably a journal or just some feature writing. I don’t know what this would turn into but I know that this time, it’ll be a matured way of writing. Come on. I’m too old to write about my crushes, my nights out with friends and all those crazy little things we do. You may say that it’s a little lousy to write about something serious, something about life, so it’s okay if you stop reading right here and go visit your favorite stories on wattpad instead while I continue becoming lousy. Good night then dear reader.